LONELINESS
My favorite catchphrase used to be “alone, not lonely.” When I wasn’t spending time alone, I used to enjoy solitude, take time for myself, and connect with friends and family. My personal life suffered a setback when I relocated to a different country for better professional opportunities. Soon, being alone became lonely, and screen time on my phone and laptop became nothing more than a diversion from the void I was feeling.
Among my 900 Instagram friends and 400 WhatsApp contacts, I felt lonely. It was unsettling not to be able to live alone while also being cut off from the rest of the world. There appears to be a gap between the emptiness outside and the hollowness within me.
Loneliness is a complicated condition. It’s a peculiarly unpleasant emotional reaction to isolation. Loneliness can be treated both clinically and non-clinically in terms of mental health. Loneliness is usually tracked as part of an anxiety or depression continuum. Simply put, loneliness is a lack of social interaction caused by a variety of factors.
Loneliness: An Overview
- Detachment- A person may feel detached from others for a variety of reasons, including fear of judgement, shame, traumatic experiences, conflicts with loved ones(LINK), and growing apart in relationships.
- Inability to form or strengthen emotional/psychological bonds with family and friends.
- Loved ones aren’t available
- Bereavement of loved ones
- Adapting to a new environment, people, or culture can be difficult.
- Mental state of agitation
- As an uncontrollable element, I’ve developed a habit.
What are the most common symptoms and signs of chronic loneliness?
The symptoms and signs of chronic loneliness vary depending on who you are and your situation. If you experience any or all of the following symptoms on a regular basis, you may be suffering from chronic loneliness:
- Inability to connect on a deeper, more personal level with others. You may have friends and family, but you only interact with them on a superficial level. Your interaction does not feel fulfilled in any way, and this disconnect appears to be never-ending.a sign of long-term loneliness
- When you try to connect or reach out, you don’t get a response, and you don’t feel seen or heard.
- There are no “best” or “close” friends. You have friends, but they’re just casual acquaintances, and you don’t feel like anyone truly “gets” you.
- Isolation that is overwhelming regardless of where you are or who is around you. Even if you’re at a party with dozens of people, you can feel isolated, separate, and disengaged. You may feel isolated and alone at work. On a bus, train, or while walking down a busy street, it’s the same. It’s as if you’re trapped inside your own impenetrable bubble.
- Negative self-worth and self-doubt feelings. Do you ever feel like you’re not good enough? Long-term feelings like these could be a sign of chronic loneliness.
- When attempting to engage socially, exhaustion and burnout occur. Trying to engage and be social with others when you’re dealing with chronic loneliness can leave you exhausted. Consistent feelings of exhaustion can lead to other problems such as insomnia, a weakened immune system, a poor diet, and more.
This occurs because we continue to consciously respond to unhealthy, unpleasant, or stressful events with our unconscious biases and beliefs, believing them to be true or, in many cases, ineffectively dealing with those unpleasant events. To put it another way, unhealthy coping mechanisms such as aloofness, self-doubt, withdrawal, emotional or binge eating, over-thinking, increased caffeine intake, alcohol, nicotine, or other drug dependence, and so on. The emotional and behavioural state may remain depressive or anxious in some cases, but it can also lead to other mental health issues in others.
Loneliness is often a cause of personality traits, but we must learn to identify which personality traits help us achieve our goals and progress in life.
What causes Loneliness?
A life-changing event (death of a close relative, breakup, divorce, etc.) or a transitional event (moving out to a new city, starting a new job, starting college, etc.) can make us feel lonely because we are cut off from others
As ironic as it may seem, a tool designed to bring people closer to their loved ones is actually making people lonely. According to studies, people in the modern era are moving away from real human interaction as their social media engagement increases
Internal factors such as low self-esteem, introversion, and an anxious temperament can all contribute to loneliness.
Constant feelings of loneliness and disconnect from social interactions are one of the most common symptoms or indicators of depression. When a person is depressed, he or she lacks motivation to interact with other people which leads to loneliness
Counseling Outcome
- Acceptance of loneliness and the knowledge that it is something that can be altered
- Self-awareness and the pattern of interactions
- Adapting to life’s changes and stressful events more effectively
- Mental health and emotional well-being have improved.
- Improvements in social interactions